Mary O'Brien, the Story of a Passenger
by Stahlfan125
Summary: Mary O'Brien is a first class girl who goes on the Titanic to go visit her sister in America. On the voyage, she meets a certain someone who is VERY good looking and VERY Welsh. Hmmm....
1. Default Chapter

Here's my Titanic fic! Yay! I know I shouldn't be working on this one with my Sister of Guinevere revisions so desperately in need of occurring, not to mention my sequel! But, hey, since this one's completed already, I'm just going to do this.

Please RR! I know it sucks, but hey, this is just me having fun.

Just a little note; I saw Titanic, I think, twice. Yep, twice. And that was when I was, maybe, seven. So, this fic doesn't follow the movie too closely, and don't expect it to be too historically accurate.

Chapter 1 

I first found out that I was going on the great ship, the Titanic, the _day_ it was shoving off. My father, a close personal friend of Captain Edward J. Smith, had gotten the tickets a long while before, but had decided to keep it a surprise for my birthday. He had already told me that we were going to America to visit my older sister, but when I discovered that we were going on the _Titanic_, my heart nearly stopped.

"The Titanic?" I asked my father incredulously. "The...the _Titanic_?"

"Well, what'd you expect, dearest?" my father had asked calmly. "Nothing but the best for my baby girl."

"I'm hardly a baby," I said teasingly, but I wrapped my arms around my father's neck and kissed him on the cheek. "Oh, thank you so much, daddy!"

"Well, it's not like I had to pay anything for the tickets," my father reminded me. "I am, after all, one of their prime investors."

"That you are," I said with mock pride, rolling my eyes. My father _adored _bragging about his position; rich, stuffy individual that he was. "So will you give me a tour?"

"I can get someone to do that for me," said my father, waving his hand slightly. "An officer, perhaps?"

"Perhaps," I said with a knowing smile.

"I _would _give you the tour myself," my father explained, shrugging. "But I don't know the boat as well as some."

"I don't really need a tour," I said hurriedly. "But, you know, maybe."

"Right. Maybe," my father said, forcing a smile.

"This is going to be amazing," I said. "Shall I get Lynn ready?"

"I already did," my father said with a grin. "Well...er...I already had someone do it."

"Right," I said, beaming. "I'll go check up on her."

"Certainly," my father said, smiling wide. I gave him one last kiss on the cheek before turning and hurrying out of the room.

When we got to the ship, we met up with some of my father's friends; high society types like ourselves. The girl, Rose DeWitt Bukater, was my age (seventeen), but she looked far older, and she was engaged. The man was Caledon Hockley, and he was a real jackass. I figured that the arrangement was one of convenience rather than love.

"Mary," said Rose, smiling when she saw me. I gave Rose a hug and a kiss on both cheeks.

"Rose," I said in reply, dipping my head low. It was all well and good to pretend that we were strangers in front of my father, but Rose and I knew that any moment we got to spend aboard the Titanic together would be an interesting one. The two of us had only met a few times, but each time we found something to laugh long and hard about. Already, I was feeling excellent about traveling on the Titanic. Not that I had been reluctant to in the first place.

"How old is _your _daughter, Richard?" Rose's mother, Ruth, asked my father with an approving smile in my direction.

"My Mary is seventeen," said my father proudly. "Very nearly eighteen. We're going to be in America for her birthday."

"Oh, how wonderful!" Ruth declared delightfully. "You are a very lucky girl!"

"Oh, I am, ma'am," I said sweetly, though inwardly I felt like vomiting. I didn't want anything to do with Ruth DeWitt Bukater or her high-society opinions. Still, for my father, I put on a smile and acted womanly to a fault.

When Ruth returned to talking with my father, I turned my attentions to my eight-year-old sister, Lynn. She was dressed in a dress that was a miniature of my own, but green and black in contrast to my blue and black.

"Mary," she whispered when she saw I was watching her. "I don't like this dress. It itches."

"I know," I whispered in reply. "But just think of it, Lynn darling. We get to ride on the Titanic. Isn't that fun?"

"I'd rather be playing with my dolls," Lynn muttered. I heard a hearty laugh behind me and turned to see Rose watching Lynn with a genuine smile.

"I'll tell you something," she whispered, crouching down to Lynn's height and touching her cheek with one gloved hand lightly. "So would I."

Lynn's normally somber face broke into a delighted smile, and she looked up at me, giggling. Rose looked up at me too, also laughing in a very girlish way. I laughed too, and behind me I heard my father and Ruth remarking on how darling we all were.

"It's the happiest I've seen Rose in weeks," I heard Ruth say, before the noise of the crowd around us overwhelmed their quiet conversation.


	2. Rose, Wandering eyes, and a case of the ...

We boarded the ship a while later, and we all waved to the masses on the dock as we shoved off. At least, Lynn, Rose, and I did, since Lynn was extremely eager to watch all the people and see if she knew anyone. My father went to see the captain, and Ruth and Caledon went to their rooms.

"So," I said to Rose as the two of us held on to Lynn as she waved ecstatically to everyone down below on the docks. "I see your mother's gone and gotten you engaged."

"Yes," said Rose with a heavy sigh. "God forbid I live past eighteen without getting married. And, of course, God forbid that I can actually _stand _the man I'm marrying."

"You don't like him, then?" I asked sadly.

"Not liking him is too weak a way to put my emotions for Mr. Caledon Hockley," said Rose contemptuously. "I _loathe _him."

"You poor thing," I said sadly, longing to pull Rose into a tight embrace, but too afraid to do so. "Come on, Lynn. We should find father. He said he'd be somewhere near the bridge. Would you accompany us, Rose?"

"Anything's better than going with _him_," Rose muttered. I made a quiet noise of agreement, though I did not know the man. As I said before; even I could see that he was a real jackass.

We made our way to the bridge, where my father was chatting with two officers. When he saw Lynn, Rose, and I, his face broke into a wide smile.

"Ah, here they are now," he said, indicating that he had just been talking about us. "My two darling daughters and their perhaps even _more _darling acquaintance."

"Acquaintance?" I muttered under my breath so only Rose could hear. Rose stifled her laughter.

"Girls, this is Fifth officer Harold Lowe and sixth officer James Moody," My father said. I shook hands politely with both men and did a proper curtsey, while Lynn hid her face in my neck, frightened.

Both men were handsome, I must say, but Lowe was the one who really caught my eye. He was examining me as well, I noticed, which caused me to look to the ground quickly, as I should have been doing all along.

"My Mary's seventeen," my father was saying proudly. "She'll be eighteen in early May. That's why we're here. Lucky chance."

"Mary?" Lynn said quietly. "I wanna take a nap."

My father looked back at us and waved his hand with a heavy sigh.

"Go on," he said. "Take her back to the room. She could use a nap."

"Goodbye officers," Rose and I said in unison, waving slightly as we turned and hurried along the deck.

As soon as we were out of earshot, Rose began to giggle. Not knowing the cause of it, I began to giggle nervously as well.

"What?" I asked her, my eyes filled with confusion.

"You can't tell me you didn't notice Lowe," Rose said incredulously.

"Oh, yes, I noticed him," I said with a relieved laugh.

"Then I suppose you noticed him...looking at you."

"Looking at me?" I asked. "How do you mean?"

"Looking...at you," said Rose, her hands cupped under her breasts.

"What?" I asked, the hand that was not holding Lynn going to cover the front of my dress. "He was not!"

"He was!" Rose said delightfully. "What man doesn't? But he was doing it right in front of your father. Oh, I could hardly contain myself."

"That's disgusting!" I exclaimed, shaking my head as we entered the room that Lynn and I were sharing.

"I, personally, don't find it all that vulgar," Rose said with an innocent grin. "You'll grow used to it."

"Rose!" I exclaimed with an incredulous laugh, gesturing to Lynn, who still clutched at me.

I set Lynn down on her bed and slowly began taking her dress off, much to her relief. Rose kept chatting about how good-looking all of the officers were, and how she hated Cal. I just murmured my agreement with everything she said; not because I wasn't listening, but because I agreed with everything she said, and she wasn't giving me a chance to say anything of my own.

As soon as Lynn was in her bed, the covers drown up to her neck, Rose and I went into my own separate room and flopped onto my bed, giggling. Rose occupied herself with looking at a picture of my mother that sat next to my bedside, remarking at once how pretty she was and how much she looked like me.

"So," she said, grinning at me as she set down the picture with the utmost care. "Now that Lynn is in the other room...what did you think of Officer Lowe?"

"What does it matter what I thought of him?" I asked, though my face was clearly turning crimson. "He's an officer."

"A very good-looking officer," Rose added.

"That, Rose, is an understatement if there ever was one," I pointed out. "But what does it matter? I am a lady of first class. If I were in second class, then perhaps there would be some hope to it...but first class? I think not."

"You're beginning to sound like my mother," said Rose, obviously disappointed.

"Well, it's not like I don't_ want_ a pretty man like Officer Lowe on my arm, and it's not as if I want to marry a man like your Caledon Hockley, but I have no other choice, do I? Only the people of lower class can afford to love."

"I almost wish I were of lower class, some days," Rose said with a heavy sigh. I snorted derisively.

"I wish it every day," I replied.

Rose and I sat in silence for quite some time after that remark. I do not know to this day what she was thinking of, but my mind was full of fantasies of what I would do if I were a woman of second class. I was not foolish enough to wish myself into steerage; only a madwoman would wish she were _that _poor, but I did imagine myself traipsing around the second class halls with Officer Lowe on my arm, with him making me promises of marriage and a wonderful life, in which we would live peacefully and raise our children together.

I almost considered telling Rose, too, before my father knocked on the door politely. Rose and I gave him leave to enter, and he stood in the doorway, smiling down at us fondly.

"Well, my dears," he said gently with a glance out at Lynn to make certain she was sleeping. "April 10th, 1912. Remember that day, ladies, for that is a date that will live on in infamy as the day the maiden voyage of the Titanic set sail."

"Yes," I said politely, smiling up at my father. "It truly is amazing."

"Amazing," Rose repeated absently. "Well, I suppose I had best return to my mother. She will be wondering where I've gone."

"Oh," I said, squeezing Rose's hand. "Of course. You will stop by to see me?"

"Of course!" Rose exclaimed with an incredulous smile. "But until then, farewell."

"Goodbye," I said with a wave as Rose stepped past my father and hurried out the door, her gloved hand pressed to her mouth. I wasn't sure if she was ready to vomit, or if she was trying to hold back laughter. With Rose, it could have been either.

"She's a lovely girl," my father remarked as the door closed behind her. "I hope you spend more time with her."

"As do I," I said politely. "But, if you don't mind, I wish to take a bit of a nap."

"Certainly!" my father exclaimed, already halfway out the door. "I'll be in my room as well. If you are in need of anything, just ask."

"Certainly," I said. "And, when you can, would you tell Mina that I am in need of her assistance."

"Certainly," said my father again, looking slightly embarrassed. He did not wish to talk of womanly things, especially with women, so he bowed out the door hurriedly, leaving me in solitary peace at last.


	3. The Second Meeting

A/N: I know that in real life, Harold Lowe was around twenty-nine when he was on the Titanic, but I changed it because I'm a loser.

Disclaimer: I don't know anything or anyone (though I DO have an imaginary friend named Ioan.) I'm not making any money off this either. Damn.

Chapter 3

When I awoke from my nap, my pocket watch read ten o'clock in the evening. I had missed lunch and supper, but a tray lay next to my bed, filled with steaming hot food.

"Thank you, Mina," I murmured softly aloud before taking a bite of a roll and closing my eyes to enjoy the scrumptious taste. Mina had certainly managed to get a large amount of food. I wondered if she had bribed the chef.

I giggled wickedly to myself. Perhaps I had already spent too much time with the very unconventional Miss Rose DeWitt Bukater. Imagine me thinking a thing of my faithful servant, just as Rose had claimed that young Officer Lowe had been looking at my breasts in broad daylight in front of my father. Though the idea was not an unpleasant one, nor was the feeling of being admired, perhaps Rose was a 'bad influence'. Did I mind? Not at all.

I finished the roll and hopped off the bed, surprised to learn that I still looked presentable, if a little pale. I put on my shoes and made my way into Lynn's room, creeping past her bed silently and out the door, into the cold night air.

I was beginning to wonder if I should have brought a jacket when I turned a corner and walked straight into someone. I lost my balance and fell on my backside, yelping in surprise. The man I had bumped into hurriedly murmured an apology and helped me up. I saw with much delight that it was young Officer Lowe.

"Miss O'Brien," said Lowe with surprise, not yet releasing my hand. "I apologize. I did not hear you coming, and I did not expect anyone to be about so late."

"The fault is all mine, Officer Lowe," I said politely. "I should not be out. I just wanted a breath of fresh air. And, please, call me Mary."

"Call me Harold, or Harry," replied Lowe. I grinned.

"All right, Harry," I said, my eyes looking into his. "Harry suits you so much better than 'Officer Lowe'."

"Mary suite you fine as well," Lowe said with a small smile. I felt myself blush and I looked away, out at the water.

"Gosh, it's beautiful," I murmured, gesturing with my free hand to the open water. Harry dropped my hand and turned, leaning on the rail that was behind him.

"It is," he said, almost dreamily. "Even officers sometimes stop to watch."

"Like you?" I asked playfully.

"Like me," Harry replied, as if I had just caught him at doing something bad and he was reluctant to admit it. "Though I suppose, if you knew me better, you'd be inclined to say 'even you'."

I glanced up at Harry in question. He hastened to explain.

"I'm not known for my sensitivity," he said with a crooked grin, a devilish glint in his eye. "I'm known as a no-nonsense type of man."

"Oh?" I asked, my eyebrow arching. "You willingly admit that men see you as... no-nonsense?"

"Yes," Harry said bravely. "But...I'm not really."

"Well, Harry," I said in a manner so flirtatious that it surprised me. "I am your chance to let the _real _you shine through the disguise."

"Oh?" Harry was beginning to sound very flirtatious as well, though he was least trying to conceal it.

"Yes," I said with a smile. "You can prove to me that you are kind and sensitive. I have not yet had the chance to see you as the 'no-nonsense' man you speak of. So, if you just act like yourself around me, I will be none the wiser."

"I see your reasoning," said Harry with a laugh. "Though I don't suppose we'll see one another enough for you to make an accurate judgment."

"Oh, I daresay we will!" I exclaimed with a laugh. "Every night out here, perhaps."

"You're suggesting we set up meetings?" Harry asked, sounding absolutely appalled.

"Well...if you don't want to..." I said timidly. Harry hastened to explain his horror.

"It's not that, no," he said quickly. "Heavens, no. It's just...your father...and..."

"Class distinctions," I said with a heavy sigh. Harry nodded abashedly. "All my life, Harry, I've been told who I can and can not speak to. Just once, I would like to talk to the person of third class without having to stick my nose in the air to make my father proud. Sometimes, I think I am the only one who notices that the people of third class are people too. I wish I could go to a lower class dance or perhaps even a pub."

"A pub?" Harry asked incredulously.

"Yes. Somewhere where everyone can do whatever they want, and not worry about spoiling their family's honor."

"I can see what you mean," Harry said sadly. "It's the same way with being an officer. You can't do anything you want to, such as hold conversations with first class passengers without them starting the conversation, for fear of spoiling the reputation of the White Star Line."

"So what do you say we break out of that just a little," I said eagerly. "And become friends."

"Friends?" Harry asked with a chuckle. "I don't think I'm allowed to have friends, especially when they're first-class passengers."

"So?" I asked. "No one has to know! My father would send me to a boarding school if he found out I was making friends with an officer, though naturally he would assume that we were _more _than just friends. That's half the fun!"

"I think you're insane," said Harry with a laugh.

"See!" I exclaimed. "That's something only a friend would say."

Harry paused for a moment, realizing what he had just said. He had just called a first-class woman insane to her face. That went against everything he had been taught about being a sailor.

"All right," he said at last. "Friends."

"Great!" I exclaimed. "Doesn't it feel good to have a friend?"

"I don't know," Harry said with a laugh. "I don't think the shock's worn off yet."

I could see that he was being sarcastic, and I laughed, walking to the railing and looking out at the ocean. Harry joined me, standing rather close, which I didn't mind a bit.

"So why are _you _going to America?" Harry asked quietly.

"It's my birthday in a few weeks," I said, my eyes still on the ocean though I could see out of the corner of my eye that Harry was watching me. "We're going to see my sister in New York. She's an actress."

"Oh?" Harry asked, sounding interested.

"Yes," I replied. "I haven't seen one of her plays myself, but I hear she's rather good. I haven't seen her since I was very young, you see, so it's rather exciting for me."

"Yes, I can see why you would be excited."

"So how did you get here?" I asked, looking up at Harry and suddenly feeling my face go red. He was looking at me in a way that no one had ever looked at me. His expression was one of admiration of my character. I had gotten stares of admiration at my looks, my dress, and my wealth, but I had never had someone look at me as if they were seeing me in a poor, ratty dress, but still liking me.

"I've been sailing since I was fourteen," said Harry. "I'm from Wales, if you hadn't noticed by the accent."

"I hadn't," I admitted. Harry nodded.

"Most people don't."

"So is that it?" I asked with a twinkle in my eye. "Is that your life story?"

"Does an officer _have _any other life?" Harry asked. I laughed, shaking my head.

"I think an officer should," I said softly. Harry shrugged.

"So do I," he said.

"How old are you?" I asked suddenly.

"Twenty-three."

"Very young to be so high up."

"I've been told," said Harry dryly. I laughed and leaned over the railing, watching the water fly past below.

"I think being an officer would be hard," I said absently. "Mostly because being at sea makes me sort of nervous, and having to be at sea nearly all the time would make me jumpy."

"Jumpy?" asked Harry with a crooked smile. I shoved him playfully.

"You know what I mean!" I exclaimed. "Edgy. I would be...uneasy a lot. I'd always be afraid that the ship was going to sink."

"You don't have to worry about that on this ship," said Harry proudly, turning and leaning his back against the railing. I mimicked his position, pulling my arms across my chest. Harry's hand was resting on the railing behind my back, and to my delight, he didn't move it. "The Titanic is said to be unsinkable."

"No ship is unsinkable," I said with confidence. "Not that I think the Titanic is going to sink anytime soon. I just think that _every _ship is sinkable."

"Well, don't worry about a thing," Harry said. "This ship is _not _going to sink."

"Your confidence is comforting," I said with a grin up at Harry. He finally noticed that his hand was resting on my back and removed it. I tried not to let my disappointment show.

"Does your father know you're out?" He asked suddenly. I laughed incredulously.

"Of course not!" I exclaimed. "He would be _very _displeased if he knew that I was out so late."

"Why?" Harry asked.

"A girl of my class should not be walking about the deck of a ship so late at night," I said in a snobbish voice that mirrored my father's. "The very idea!"

Harry laughed under his breath, though he tried to contain himself. Obviously, he thought that my impression was a good one. I was rather proud of it myself.

"You probably should be getting back to your room," Harry said, his hand automatically traveling to my shoulder. "You're freezing."

"I am a bit chilly," I said with a lighthearted grin. "I just...I like it out here."

"Well, you have every night to come out here," Harry said. "And next time, maybe you can bring a blanket."

"I'll consider it," I said sarcastically. "Goodnight, Harry."

"Goodnight, Mary," Harry said, taking my hand and kissing it politely with his eyes on me the entire time, so intense that it made me blush.

"I'll be seeing you around, then," I said reluctantly, hurrying out of Harry's sight before I allowed myself to lean against the wall, my hand going to my forehead. "I think I'm going to faint!" I murmured, giggling to myself. I couldn't _wait _to tell Rose!


	4. Accusation

Chapter 4

I saw Rose the next morning during breakfast. When she saw me, she beckoned me over to the table she was sharing with a Margaret Brown.

"We missed you at dinner last night," Rose said. "Too busy thinking of Officer Lowe's eyes on you to do anything else?"

My eyes widened and I stared at Rose in shock, my eyes gesturing towards Margaret. Rose laughed, and after a pause, Margaret did as well.

"Oh, don't be cautious of me, dear," she said, her hand reaching across the table and resting on mine. "Think of me as someone your own age trapped in this old woman's body."

"Margaret is a lovely person to talk with," Rose proclaimed heartily. "I was just telling her about Officer Lowe looking you over yesterday near the bridge."

"And right in front of your father!" Margaret exclaimed, throwing her head back and laughing. A few people seated nearby looked over at her as she laughed. She noticed, but didn't seem to care. She did lower her voice, though, for what she said next. "And, if I'm not mistaken, I do believe I saw Officer Lowe and some brown haired girl who looked curiously like you talking at around ten o'clock last evening."

My mouth dropped open, and I flushed a furious red color. Rose gasped as well, and she began laughing under her breath.

"Why were you out at ten in the evening?" I asked Margaret. She laughed and leaned closer, as if it were a great secret.

"I couldn't sleep a wink last night," she said. "So I went out to take a stroll. I heard some bodies laughing, and I peered around the corner and saw you two. I could have sworn to Jesus that I saw his hand on your back, too. Really, girl, you move too fast!"

"No!" I exclaimed, giggling despite myself. "Really, that was only for a half-a-second before he realized he was doing it. I ran into him as I was turning a corner last night, and we just got to talking. That's all. There's nothing more to it."

"I bet you wish there was," Rose said with a grin.

"Who wouldn't?" Margaret asked with a chuckle. "Handsome young man like that on a ship like this? Why, it's a dream come true! Or, perhaps, a fantasy."

I felt my cheeks flushing crimson, but I liked the way Margaret talked. She said things that I only dared to think when I was lying in bed late at night, as I had done the night before after I had snuck back into my bed after my encounter with Harry. Thoughts like those should never be spoken aloud in a public place, but Margaret seemed to get a kick out of doing it.

"So, will you be meeting Officer Lowe again tonight?" Rose asked, insinuating. I laughed and looked down at my plate, which was still filled.

"I believe so," I said abashedly. "But I hope I see him other than that today!"

"I think I'll be spending my day with her," said Rose to Margaret, earning another delighted squeal from the older woman. I blushed and smiled at the people who again glanced at our table, annoyed scowls on their faces.

Later on in the day, I was standing against the railing where I had met Harry the night before when I heard someone walking towards me. I looked up, and saw Harry moving towards me with a smile on his face.

"Miss O'Brien," he said politely, bowing. I did a proper curtsey and stuck out my hand for him to kiss. He did so dutifully.

"Officer Lowe," I said, smiling at him. "Off duty?"

"For now," Harry said, grinning that crooked grin again. "I thought I might find you here."

"Naturally," I said, grinning. "This has fast become my favorite spot."

"Oh?" Harry asked, one eyebrow rising. "May I inquire as to why?"

"Well," I said, pretending to be offended. "I think it would be unladylike to tell you."

Harry laughed, leaning against the railing and looking down into the water with me, watching the water drift out and away from the boat. We stood there in a companionable silence for quite some time, before I finally had to break it.

"You know," I said sadly. "I was just thinking. After this voyage...we may never see each other again."

"We could write," Harry suggested. I nodded sadly.

"We could," I replied. "But it just wouldn't be the same."

"It wouldn't," Harry agreed. "I suppose that's the worst part to being a sailor."

"I should think so," I said grumpily. "Well, when I turn twenty-one and move in with my sister, you can be sure that I'll be waiting for you on the docks after every voyage of yours to see you in person."

"But Mary," said Harry with a laugh. "I met you yesterday. Already, you're making this into a lifelong friendship."

"Well," I said. "We'll know each other lots better in a few years. And don't you feel like you know me lots already? I know I feel like I've known you for _ages_."

"Well, yes, I feel like I've known you for a long time, but that's probably just..."

"Just God's way of telling us that our friendship is meant to be?" I asked, giggling. Harry shook his head, but could not help himself. He chuckled along with my giggling.

"That's not what I was going to say," he said with a smile. "But I guess that works."

"Wouldn't that be lovely, though," I said dreamily, my eyes fixed on the deep blue horizon. "If God got involved with people's lives like that. Like when people say love at first sight; or, in our case, friendship at first sight. Wouldn't that be amazing if it actually _was _love...or friendship...at first sight, because that was what God intended?"

I stopped and blushed, realizing that I was rambling on, and that Harry was staring at me with his mouth open, as if he was trying to think of something to say, but couldn't.

"I'm sorry," I said, forcing a laugh. "That was completely uncalled for. I just started talking and couldn't stop and..."

Harry covered my lips with his hand. I blushed and looked away from his intense gaze. His hand moved to my cheek, and he looked down at me, a small smile touching his lips.

"I think it _is _amazing," he whispered. Then, he voice grew louder, and he removed his hand, leaving it burning where it had touched me. "I will see you another time. I should be getting to the bridge."

"Right," I said quietly, smiling and allowing him to kiss my gloved hand for the third time. I told myself that I would leave my gloves off at our next encounter, so I could feel his lips on my flesh. I knew that those thoughts were improper, especially for a woman of my class, but I didn't care. No one could get into my head and examine them, so I could think whatever I wanted.

I made my way back into Lynn's room, where she and my father were sitting, reading a storybook aloud. When I entered, my father looked up and smiled.

"I've been waiting for you," he said, sounding slightly ominous. I smiled nervously and removed my gloves.

"Oh?" I asked, trying to keep my fear out of my voice. My father hadn't sounded at all happy. Perhaps Margaret Brown _had _told him about my late-night encounter with Harry. The very thought made me flush with shame.

"In your room, if you please," my father said, setting Lynn aside and beckoning. I followed him to my room abashedly, and I could see Lynn wince as I walked by. Even she knew that I was in a lot of trouble.

"I saw you talking with an officer," my father said, too calm for the situation. "Officer Lowe, if I'm not mistaken."

"You are not mistaken," I said with just as much calm, seating myself on my bed and laying my gloves down carefully, the very picture of calm and serenity. My father's eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"The two of you seemed very...friendly."

"We were friendly," I said, though I took the insinuating tone that my father had used on the word 'friendly', and made it seem innocent and childish. "Would you like me to explain?"

"Of course," my father said, looking very frustrated that I was not cowering on the floor and begging for forgiveness.

"You see, last night when I woke up, I felt very sick, and I needed some fresh air. So, I slipped outside. I was going to the place where Rose, Lynn, and I had waved to the people at the port earlier in the day, and while turning a corner I walked directly into Ha...Officer Lowe. He was very kind and apologized profusely, though I'm certain the fault was all mine. Then, we had a little talk, mostly about the Titanic and her workings. Today, I nearly ran into him again, and we had another talk. He's agreed to see if he can give me a tour sometime."

"Oh," My father said, sounding very defeated. "Well, that sounds lovely, darling. I could have gotten you a tour..."

"I know," I said quickly. "But I didn't want to trouble you. Besides, I had the perfect opportunity."

"Well, I am touched that you cared enough to not want to bother me," said my father with a sarcastic chuckle. "And I daresay that Lowe is a good a boy as any for the job. A nice boy, and very gentlemanlike. If he was of our class, I'd consider marrying you off to him!"

He threw back his head and laughed as if it were the most amusing thing in the world. I just flushed a deep scarlet and looked at my hands that were resting in my lap. Class. Always class. Why did class and wealth have to matter so much? Why couldn't people just _be_, no matter whether they were rich or poor. Why couldn't everyone be rich? That would be simply lovely. I would be able to think of Harry without crossing a class border, and I would possibly even be married to Harry, the way my father was laughing.

"Well, I suppose you have had a very trying day," my father said. I snorted under my breath, but not so he could hear me. A trying day? I had gone for tea with Rose and had spent the rest of my day playing the social butterfly, talking to stuffy old women in hats that completely covered their heads and kept people at a distance for ten feet on either side because of the size of them! How was that a trying day?

"I have," I said instead, smiling innocently. My father kissed me on the cheek and started for the door. When he got there, he turned and looked at me, looking slightly ashamed of himself.

"I'm sorry, Mary, for assuming the worst."

"You're my father," I said with a smile. "That's your job."

My father laughed and walked out the door, closing it behind him. I lay on my bed and stared at the clock, wishing that it could just skip from four fifteen in the afternoon to ten in the evening, so I could traipse outside onto the deck to see Harry again. That's what my life on the Titanic was becoming, you see; meetings with Harry. Also, I looked forward to tea the next morning with Rose and possibly Margaret, but that was it.

I heard Lynn giggling in the next room, and I smiled with content. I closed my eyes and let myself listen to what was going on beneath me. I expected to hear the whir of motors, but I heard laughing and music, so faint that I only heard it for a moment, when everything else was silent. I remembered that I had said to Harry the night before when we stood at the railing. I had said that just once I wanted to go to a third class dance.

"Wouldn't that be lovely," I whispered aloud, before slipping into a dream-filled sleep.


	5. Awakenings

Chapter 5

My eyes cracked open, and I yawned, sitting up luxuriously. I glanced at the clock and saw, with horror, that it was ten fifteen in the evening. I leapt out of bed and grabbed a shawl off the chair next to my writing desk, hardly noticing that the thing was so flimsy, it wouldn't protect me at all from the cold. Then, I dashed through the conjoining room and out into the cold night air.

I found Harry standing by the railing, staring out into the ocean. When he heard me running towards him, he turned, looking very relieved.

"I'm sorry," I said, out of breath. "I fell asleep, you see, and I..."

I slipped as I reached him, and just barely managed to keep my footing by flinging one hand out to grab the railing in front of him, and the other out to grab his arm. I giggled nervously, and Harry steadied me, his hands on my arms. He didn't remove his hands after I regained my balance, I noticed with much satisfaction.

"I was beginning to worry that you had forgotten," he said quietly, his eyes burning into mine with such intensity that I could not look away. "Or that I had taken a joke you made too seriously."

"No, no!" I exclaimed, my hand grasping Harry's arm so that our arms were entwined. "I didn't intend to fall asleep, but I hadn't got much sleep last night, so as soon as my head hit the pillow..."

"I understand," Harry said with a small smile. "I'm giving up my opportunity to sleep as well."

"You are?" I gasped, feeling very guilty. "Oh, I didn't mean to...you should go then...You have so much work..."

Again, Harry placed his hand over my lips, and I fell silent, feeling extremely guilty. Harry laughed quietly, his hand remaining on my lips. I wondered if the skin of his palm was crawling the way my lips were.

"I'd give up my sleep freely to be with you," he said. "You were right earlier. I do feel like I've known you for so much longer than I do. I know it's rash...but I feel as if we have been courting for...years, but without the pleasure of kissing and holding hands and such."

"You feel the same way too?" I whispered, my eyes wide. "I was too frightened to speak it aloud, for fear of scaring you away!"

"Scare me away?" Harry asked with a small chuckle. "No. I'm too intrigued by you to even dare to stop thinking about you for more than a moment."

"I feel the same way," I said, laughing with relief. "It seems as if everything I do somehow relates to you. Every conversation, I talk of you or think of you. People who I barely know mention you in my presence, and my face lights up like a candle!"

"James saw you today and said you were beautiful, and I got jealous," Harry said excitedly. "I told him to stay away from you."

"You did?" I asked delightfully. "Do you think God got involved, like I was thinking earlier?"

"It would seem so," Harry said, his voice softening. His hand moved from my shoulder to my cheek. I felt my cheek burn with that familiar sensation.

"Does your hand tingle from being there?" I asked. Harry nodded slowly, a soft smile spreading across his features.

"Every time I kiss your hand..." he began, but he trailed off.

"Go on," I prodded.

"It is not proper," Harry mumbled, starting to turn away.

"If my father knew half the thoughts I was thinking of you while he was talking to me this afternoon, he would throw me overboard himself," I said quickly. "So please, go on." When he hesitated, I continued. "The last time you kissed my hand, I told myself that I was going to leave my gloves off for our next encounter, so your lips would touch my flesh."

Harry flushed only slightly, and he looked back out into the ocean. I took his hand in my own, and I showed him my lack of gloves. He smiled and turned to completely face me.

"Every time I kiss your hand, I imagine it is your lips," he said softly. I smiled up at him and moved closer, one hand resting itself on his chest and the other finding his shoulder. Before he could say anything, I leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. His hands cupped my face and he leaned into the kiss, his eyes closed. Suddenly, I didn't care if my father threw me overboard, as long as Harry was there with me.

We pulled away, and I leaned into his chest as his arms encircled me, protecting me from the cold and from the harsh class distinctions that we were eventually going to have to face. I found myself playing with one of the buttons on his officer's jackets as we stood there. The silence was slightly awkward, but it was to be expected after our first kiss. After all, we had only met the day before.

"That was amazing," I whispered finally, not moving from my shielded niche in Harry's arms. Harry made a small noise of agreement and began playing with my hair as I was playing with his button.

"Let's hope it doesn't end up like Romeo and Juliet," he said quietly, amusement in his voice. I shuddered, imagining me in the great tomb from the famous Shakespearean play, waking up to find my Harry dead of poison. Harry noticed the shiver and held me tighter. "Are you cold?" he asked.

"No," I lied. "And even if I were, I'd gladly stand here forever with you in the cold until I froze."

Harry laughed into my hair, and I shivered again, this time delightfully, my hands grabbing his arms and my head snuggling deeper into his chest.

"I can't believe this," he said, his hand steadily moving on my hair. "Us."

"Me neither," I whispered. "But I'm glad it happened."

Harry grunted in agreement and pulled away from me, leaning against the railing. I joined him, and he reached out and took my hand, holding it close to him. For a long while we stood there, until Harry finally broke the silence.

"You should go," he said, pulling away from me reluctantly. "I don't want your father to..."

"Right," I said, just as reluctantly. I leaned into him and kissed him once more, savoring the taste of his lips. "Tomorrow, then."

"Tomorrow," said Harry, obviously out of breath and slightly taken-aback. "Yes...tomorrow."

"I can hardly wait," I whispered, holding out my hand. Harry took it, looking pained, and kissed it, sending shivers up my arm and straight into my heart.

"Neither can I," Harry whispered. We stayed there for another moment or so before we finally tore away from one another and made our way back to our rooms.

"You _what?_" Rose gasped, clutching my pillow to her chest, which was heaving with excitement.

"I know!" I exclaimed, my hands flying to my throat. "I can't believe I did it myself, but..."

"No, I'm not upset!" Rose exclaimed. "I'm just..._shocked_. And so happy for you!"

"Happy for me?" I asked. "How could this turn out good for Harry and I? He is an officer, and I am a lady of first class. This relationship was over before it began!"

"If you look at it that way," Rose pointed out. "Listen, you must not tell anyone, but I have met a man as well."

"But Rose!" I exclaimed, horrified. Rose held up a gloved hand.

"I know!" she exclaimed. "But you must understand how wretched Cal is. This man...he's unlike any man I have ever met! He is kind and...funny, and very good-looking. He taught me to spit earlier this morning."

"To spit?" I asked, confused.

"Yes, like a man," Rose continued. Then, she grew sad. "Though I suppose it can never work out with us either. He is from third class."

"Third class?" I asked, my eyes widening. "Why, Rose..."

"I know," Rose said with a heavy sigh. "I should not have even considered it."

"No," I said firmly. "You did what I have done, and more. You did not look at the man's class while falling for him. If only more people were like us."

"If only!" Rose laughed. "Then I could marry Jack, and you and Officer Lowe could marry as well."

"Wouldn't that be lovely," I said with a sigh of content. "But the majority of the world are not like us, and we can not have what we want."

"Which is very disheartening," Rose added. I nodded sadly.

"It is," I whispered. Suddenly, Rose pulled me to my feet.

"Come on," she said. "I know one woman who doesn't care about class."

"Margaret Brown?" I asked. Rose nodded firmly.

"We'll go talk to her."

"Well, that good will that do?" I asked, dropping the pillow I had been holding onto the bed.

"It will let us know that there is at least one other sane woman on this ship besides the two of us!" Rose proclaimed. Without giving me a chance to complain, she flung opened the door, and the two of us waltzed out into the other room, where Lynn sat playing with her dolls.

"Can I come?" she asked eagerly. Rose laughed.

"You most certainly must come!" she exclaimed, lifting Lynn into the air and handing her to me. "The more young minds we affect, the better!"

"Rose," I said, a small chuckle escaping my lips. "What has gotten into you?"

"I don't know!" Rose admitted with a laugh. "But I like it. I really do."

"So do I!" I laughed, and we exited the room, walking out into the frigid evening air. It was around seven in the evening, and was already getting dark, but when we knocked on Margaret's door, she let us right in, fussing over Lynn and how pretty she looked in her dress.

"Like a little angel," she said, chuckling heartily. Lynn grinned up at her, intrigued with this woman.

"Margaret," said Rose with a smile. "I'm sure you already have suspected something about Jack and I."

"Suspected? Girl, I knew more than that. It didn't take much to see the love in your eyes when you looked at him."

Rose turned and beamed at me proudly. I smiled back. I wondered if I would ever get to meet this Jack fellow. He was a saint in my book if he could make Rose smile like that.

"Well, Mary and a certain young officer shared a little rendezvous again last night," Rose began teasingly. "And...they kissed!"

Margaret squealed with laughter, causing Lynn to giggle hysterically. Margaret gave me a huge hug and kissed me on both cheeks in her excitement.

"My dear, two days you've known him, barely, but I daresay that for you, this is truly the ship of dreams."

"It is," I said with a laugh.

For another hour or so, we stayed and talked with Margaret about how unfair the class distinctions were, and how we wished that more people were like her. Lynn even said a few things about how she met a third class girl in the park and how sad she was when father told her that she couldn't play with the girl.

"It wasn't fair," she said, pouting.

"You see!" Rose said, standing up. "Here's another like us! There must be more. We can't be the only ones."

"I'd say most of third class don't think class matters," Margaret put in. "Maybe some of second class as well."

When the clock struck nine in the evening, we decided that we had better take leave. We said goodbye to Margaret, and arranged to meet her for tea the next morning. Then, we parted, and Rose went to her room, which wasn't far, and I took the long way along the deck to get to my room.

I was almost to my room when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I yelped in alarm and spun around, laughing with relief when I saw that it was only Harry, grinning broadly.

"Harry!" I exclaimed, my face turning red in an instant. "You frightened me!"

"I apologize," Harry said, kissing my hand. Lynn hid behind me and peeked out at Harry, curious.

"This is my sister, Lynn," I said. "Lynn, this is Officer Harold Lowe. Do you remember him from the day we set off?"

Lynn nodded, smiling up at Harry shyly.

"You can call me Harry," Harry whispered to Lynn. She giggled and nodded and hid back in my skirts. Harry and I laughed quietly.

"We just left Margaret Brown's room," I said, hoisting Lynn up. "Do you remember Rose, my friend who was with me the day we met?"

"Yes," Harry said.

"Well, she has fallen in love with a man from third class."

"Has she?" Harry asked, looking surprised. "So you're not the only first class girl who doesn't look down her nose at everyone."

"Actually, to tell you the truth...I think Rose _did _look down her nose at everyone before she met this Jack fellow. That's not to say she wasn't a nice person before...but she just didn't..."

"I know what you mean," Harry said gently. I laughed nervously and nodded. "Perhaps more people will get this...awakening."

"I only hope my father gets it," I muttered under my breath. Harry heard me, though I had not intended for him to, and he nodded.

"So do I," he said, reaching for my hand and kissing it once again. Then, he turned and walked the other way.

I sighed with happiness and turned towards my room. Lynn stopped hiding her face in my neck and peered after Harry, her smile wide.

"I like him," she whispered. "He's just like you. Only...a man."

"Really?" I asked. Lynn nodded.

"It's in your eyes," she said, looking out to the ocean like I did whenever I was trying to think of something to say. "Like...you both know that you're right and the rest of the world are wrong...but you know that if you say anything, then it will just cause trouble, so you keep quiet. So in your eyes there's this...kind of smug knowing. You can't miss it."

I stared at Lynn in utter shock, my mouth open. I tried to think of something to say, but my brain wouldn't let me talk. How could an eight year old think of _that_?

"I..." I stammered, my eyes drifting out to the ocean. "Wow."


	6. Can It Last

Chapter 6

That night, Harry and I met again on the deck. We greeted one another with the usual hand kiss. Then, to my surprise, Harry cupped my face in his hands and kissed me. It wasn't the actual kiss that surprised me so much as the passion behind it, as if we had not seen one another for years.

"I have been waiting to do that all today," Harry said breathlessly when the kiss was over. "It is as if I _need _you."

Suddenly, I began to cry. Not because Harry had kissed me (heavens, no!), but because of what Harry had said. He needed me, and I needed him. What would happen when we reached America?

"Do you realize that there is no happy end to this?" I asked, trying to sniffle back my tears. Harry's arms enveloped me, protecting me from the cold and from my own fears. "We will be forced to...part!"

"We will find a way," Harry whispered. "We will."

"I can run away," I suggested. "I could lose my father in the crowd, and I can slip off to my sister's house, unnoticed. I know you have to return to the ship, but at least then I will be able to..."

"I could not return," Harry whispered into my hair. "I can not leave your presence for barely a day! How do you expect me to leave you for months at a time?"

"Perhaps you only feel the need to be around me now because we have just fallen in love," I whispered. "Perhaps the need to be with me will fade in time..."

Harry cut me off by pressing his lips to mine passionately. I could not resist. I wrapped my arms around his neck and stood on one foot, pushing myself up to his height, pushing into him.

"No," he said, between kisses, his breaths short, passionate pants. "This will never fade."

My hands cupped his face, and his arms wrapped around my shoulders, and we both pulled one another closer until there was not one bit of space between us. Our bodies were shaped so that we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle.

"I love you," I whispered, pulling my lips away from his. "I know it's wrong; we've known each other for such a short time...but I can't deny what I'm feeling. I love you, Harry. I truly do."

"I feel the same way," Harry whispered. "Though it _is _wrong. But don't worry. We'll find a way to be together."

"_If _our love doesn't fade," I said warningly. Harry laughed under his breath.

"You sound as if you're almost _hoping _for our love to fade," Harry said, his chuckles sending white puffs of steam into the air.

"I almost am," I replied. "So we won't be heartbroken if something happens, and we can't be together..."

"We _will_ find a way," Harry whispered to me, his face bent very close to mine. I lay my head on his chest and allowed him to protect me in his warm embrace, so full of love.

"We must," I murmured to myself.

The next morning, I awoke late. My father, when he met me for luncheon, asked after my health. I lied and said that I had a bout of seasickness, but expected it to clear after a few days.

"My stomach has been hurting," was my excuse. "I've been needing a lot of sleep."

My lie got me out of dinner with some of the first class snobs, and I was allowed to eat in my room with Lynn. Rose stopped by after she had finished eating and told me about all the adventures she had had with Jack, which included going to a third class dance and standing at the bow of the ship with Jack, 'flying'.

"It sounds amazing," I said dreamily. Rose giggled and hugged Lynn to her, her face flushed with happiness.

"I've never been happier in all my life," she whispered to me. Lynn cooed delightfully and continued playing with Rose's beautiful red curls.

"I'm truly happy for you," I replied.

That night, Harry and I met again on the deck. Though by now, the routine was becoming familiar, I knew that I would _never _tire of it. In fact, I almost wished that the voyage would last forever, so I could spend every night with Harry out on the deck.

That night, we spoke of love, and of the hatred that filled the world. It was amazing for me to listen to Harry speak and realize that he held the same opinions that I did, almost down to the exact words that I had used. I remembered what Lynn had said to me about Harry and I being almost exactly the same, and I told him.

"She said that?" he asked, his eyes wide with surprise.

"Yes!" I exclaimed. "Can you believe it? I was speechless!"

"Wow!" Harry said, looking out at the ocean. "Do you realize how right she is?"

"I do," I whispered, squeezing Harry's hands, which were clasped in my own.

"Does she know...about us?" Harry asked.

"I think she inferred," I replied. "I haven't spoken to her about it yet, but I think she knows."

"You should speak with her," Harry replied. I nodded reluctantly.

"I know," I replied, sighing slightly. "But for now, I'd prefer to keep this relationship a secret."

"Why?" Harry asked, sounding injured.

"You know, my father," I said. "And, you know, I don't want Lynn getting any ideas about me that aren't true."

"What ideas?" Harry asked, now sounding horrified. He dropped my hands and took a step back.

"I don't..." I tried to think of words to describe what I was feeling, realizing that Harry was taking it the wrong way entirely. "I don't want her thinking that I'm, you know, a...a whore."

"Why would she think you a whore?" Harry asked indignantly. "Because you're setting up meetings with an officer? I thought you _wanted _to break the boundaries of first class! I thought you _wanted _to be with me!"

"I do!" I exclaimed with horror

"But you just don't want anyone to think you're my _whore_," Harry said, mock realization in his voice. "And just by being associated with me, you're afraid that your father and all his stuffy first class friends will think you _are _my whore."

"Harry," I said, getting slightly frightened that Harry was beginning to sound so angry. "No, you..."

"I should have known it was too good to last," Harry said bitterly, taking a step back. "You were right all along, you know that? This love wasn't meant to last."

"Yes it was!" I exclaimed passionately, trying to take Harry's hand. He took it back quickly.

"Tell me, Mary. Do you love me?"

"Yes!" I sobbed, tears running down my face and spoiling my makeup.

"Then maybe you should've stopped worrying about what other people think," Harry sneered, and before I could say anything, he turned on his heel and stalked off, leaving me to fall to the ground and cry.

The next morning, before anyone had yet awoken, I stood outside on the deck in one of my favorite dresses; an emerald green piece with silver lacing and diamond decorating the bodice. I was feeling very pretty and sophisticated with my hair done up and my makeup on for the breakfast I was attending with my father and a few other first class members. Though I was loath to go to the silly thing, it did feel nice to be so well dressed.

I kept a lookout for Harry, certain that he would approach me, and we would both apologize, and all would be forgiven. The relationship could certainly not be over yet. I could feel it that our love was meant to last.

As I was standing there, I felt a hand on my shoulder and spun around, expecting to see Harry. When I saw Caledon Hockley standing there, the smile that was forming on my lips faded, and I stared up at him, feeling slightly frightened.

"M...Mr. Hockley," I said, smiling politely. "What a..."

"Tell me what you know about Rose and a boy from third class," Cal said roughly, still not letting go of my shoulder.

"What?" I asked, pretending to be completely surprised. "Who?"

"Rose!" Cal exclaimed, exasperated.

"Well, I know that!" I retorted indignantly, my chin coming up. "I was asking about this boy you mention."

"So you have not heard anything?" Cal asked suspiciously.

"I don't even have the slightest idea what you might be talking about!" I replied haughtily. Cal grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me once furiously. I gasped in surprise, my eyes widening in horror.

"You're her closest friend!" he roared at me, shaking me again. My hat fell off my head, and my hair fell down about my shoulders as he continued to shake me. I tried to pull away, but I could not.

Suddenly, Cal stopped shaking me as he was pulled away from me roughly. Angry, he shoved me, and I tumbled to the ground in a heap, managing to keep my skirts under control, thankfully.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave Miss O'Brien alone," said Harry firmly, with all the calm poise of an officer.

"What?" Cal asked, sneering very close in Harry's face. Harry didn't blink or move away, but repeated his earlier command, his back straight and his chin tilted only slightly upwards.

Cal looked to me and saw me sitting on the ground with a dumbfounded look on my face. Then he looked to Harry and saw the anger in his eyes. He seemed suspicious, but he didn't say anything about it. He just walked away with as much dignity as he could muster, back into the ship.

"Are you alright, Miss O'Brien?" Harry asked me stiffly, holding his hand out to help me. I took it gratefully, and Harry pulled me up, momentarily pulling me close to his chest with one hand on my back before releasing.

"Yes. Thank you Harry," I said shakily, holding onto the railing to keep myself standing.

"Do you wish me to alert your father, Miss O'Brien?" Harry asked, still stiff and formal. I was beginning to feel uneasy.

"No, Harry," I said quietly. "I highly doubt he would do anything to jeopardize his standing with Ruth Dewitt Bukater. Thank you, though, for helping me. I daresay Mr. Hockley would have thrown me overboard if you hadn't come along."

"Goodbye, Miss O'Brien," said Harry, almost sadly, turning and walking away. I considered running after him, but I didn't know who might be about in the morning, so I didn't want to risk anyone seeing me.

Perhaps Harry had been right. Perhaps our love _wasn't _meant to last. Perhaps it was just too difficult to be in love when the class distinctions were so strong. I wondered to myself if Rose and Jack were going to fight and end up breaking off their love as Harry and I did.

I should have just let my father find out, though at the time it was the worst possible thing that could have happened. But, by the time I thought of saying anything to Harry, he was already out of sight.


	7. The Ship Is Sinking

Chapter 7

This part of my story is the story that many of you have probably already heard. The night was the fourteenth of April. The night the Titanic sank.

At ten o'clock, I went to stand on the deck to see if Harry would appear. I stood there for nearly an hour before it became too cold, and I abashedly went back to my room, crying piteously.

Then, I slept. I had dreams that night of Harry jumping off the ship, which still seems odd to me. He was standing at the place where we had stood and talked together, and he just spread open his arms and jumped. All through this, I tried to tell him to stop, but he did not hear me. I had that dream more than once that night, though I do not know the exact number.

I was awoken when Lynn shook me, yelling my name. I was slow to awake, but Lynn calmly waited until I sat up and rubbed my eyes, asking what was wrong. I could see right away that something _was _terribly wrong. Lynn's eyes were red and puffy from crying, and she was wearing a lifejacket, holding another one out to me with one trembling arm.

"The ship is sinking," she said, her voice vacant and haunting. I gasped and grabbed the lifejacket, glad that I had fallen asleep in my dress so I would not have to walk about in my nightdress and freeze.

"Where is father?" I asked hurriedly, buckling the lifejacket and grabbing a blanket off my bed, wrapping it around Lynn before scooping her up and heading out into the main room.

"I don't know," Lynn sobbed, burying her face in my neck. "He left after he told me. He told us to stay in here."

"Don't you worry, we'll find him," I assured Lynn as we walked out onto the deck. People all around us were panicking as the band played calmly in the background. I turned every which way, trying to catch sight of my father. Lynn was sobbing into my neck, her arms nearly choking me. I felt tears of panic prickling my own eyes as I looked around, trying to find him.

Suddenly, I was knocked to the floor by a heavyset man who was rushing along the deck, panting. I managed to keep Lynn in my arms, but I succeeded in hitting my head painfully on the deck floor. Lynn began screaming hysterically, and part of me just wanted to lie there and not move as the ship went down.

I felt someone pull me up, and as the dizziness cleared, I saw Harry staring down at me.

"You need to get to a boat," he was saying. I shook my head.

"I need to find my father," I sobbed, my eyes as wide as saucers. Harry pulled me close to him and kissed the top of my head reassuringly.

"Promise me you'll get on a boat," he whispered.

"I promise," I replied into his chest, my tears staining the front of his jacket. "I love you."

"And I love you," Harry replied softly.

"Lowe!" yelled someone far off to the side. "Goddammit, Lowe. Where are you?"

"Get to a boat!" Harry yelled as he dashed off into the crowd, disappearing quickly.

"Where's father?" Lynn shrieked, searching all around us with tear-filled eyes. "He's not out here!"

"How do you know?" I snapped. Lynn fell to sobbing again, clutching my neck and muttering incoherently.

"Mary!" yelled someone from behind me suddenly. I turned and saw Rose running towards me, dragging a blonde-haired boy along after her.

"Rose!" I exclaimed, wrapping an arm around her waist as she embraced me. "We need to find a boat..."

"There _are _no boats!" Rose yelled over the noise. "They're all gone! The last ones are being filled now."

I looked around at all the people swarming the deck, and then back to Rose. She nodded, and I knew that she understood what I had been thinking. Why weren't there enough boats for everyone?

"What are we going to do?" I asked, starting to panic once again. "I can't find my father, and I have Lynn..."

"Go to the bow!" yelled the blonde-haired boy, herding Rose and I towards the bow. I gathered that the boy was Jack, and I decided that it would be best to listen to what he said.

This next part of my memory is hazy. All I remember is the boat pointed straight up to the sky, sinking quickly into the water, as I lay over the bow railing with Lynn clutched in my arms. I remember searching for Harry, and being frightened when I did not see him among the people clinging to the railing for dear life. Lynn noticed my sadness, and she patted my hand comfortingly as we braced ourselves for our entry into the freezing cold water.

The water was so cold that for a few moments after entering it, I could not breathe. Lynn screamed in horror and clung to me tighter, her breath warming my face.

"It's too cold!" she sobbed. I tried to calm her, but it was impossible, seeing as how I was just as scared and cold as she was.

I took the wet blanket off of Lynn and watched it float down into darkness. I watched it even after it had gone, wondering when it was going to stop. I tried to block out the noises all around me; the noises of screaming passengers, doomed to die, and of wailing children all around me. Why the children? Why were there still children there?

I looked around for Rose and Jack, but could not see them. They had been lost in the dark waters and the crowd of people bobbing at the surface. I tried calling Rose's name once or twice, but I could barely hear myself over the other screams and shouts, so I abandoned that attempt as futile.

"Okay, Lynn," I said, trying to sound calm and cheerful. "Let's start swimming, okay? Just start moving your arms and legs and swim. We should get away from this crowd."

Lynn was not a stupid girl, though she was only eight years old at the time. She knew that I was just trying to cheer her up and get her mind off the _dire _situation she was in, and she wasn't buying any of it. Still, for my benefit, she nodded and attempted to wipe away her tears with her hand, succeeding in only getting her face _more _wet.

"Okay," I said with a sigh. "Let's go. Why don't you put one hand on my back there and hold on, but still keep your arms and legs moving. I think it might be good for your blood."

"'Kay," Lynn murmured, moving her arms and legs in even strokes like I had told her too. We slowly began moving through the crowd of people, practically invisible next to the throngs of men that were gathered around. Everyone pretty much left us alone. "Mary? Maybe...maybe we could look for father."

"I'm sure father's on a lifeboat," I lied. "Right now, we just have to concentrate on staying alive, all right?"

"Sounds like a good idea," Mary said seriously, nodding her head almost reverently. I just turned all my concentration to swimming and pulling Lynn along with me. I didn't know where I was going, but I just wanted to get out of the mass of people and find something to climb on to maybe.

I found that something in a large piece of wood that was floating a little ways out of the crowd. No one was even considering going near it, it seemed, as the wood was too small to support any of them. For Lynn and I, however, it was perfect.

"Lynn, sweetie," I said. "Give me your hand."

Lynn gave me her hand silently, and I saw that it was shaking with cold. Guiltily, I pushed her up onto the wood, where she huddled, shivering, as I started to climb up as well.

Suddenly, I saw an officer bobbing nearby, the only part of him visible to me his brown hair and officer's coat. It was obvious that the man was dead, or close to it, by the way he was stiff and unmoving.

"Harry!" I exclaimed tearfully, swimming over to the body. I whirled it around and saw that it was not, in fact, Harry, but some other officer that I dimly recognized but did not know the name to. "Oh, thank the Lord."

Still, I was frightened for Harry. I wanted nothing more than to feel his arms around me, keeping me warm and safe once again. I wondered if he was out there in that mass of men, and if he was still alive.

"Mary, get on!" Lynn ordered me. I swam back to her and climbed onto the wood, lying on my stomach next to her to avoid tipping the wood over.

"You can't move at all, Lynn," I said, resting my head on my arms and looking at Lynn, who lay close to me. "Here, move closer."

I put my arm over my shivering sister and held her close to me, warming her with my body heat.

"What do we do now?" she said into my chest, her speech muffled.

"We wait," I said, trying to sound cheerful but only succeeding in sounding hopeless.

"For what?" Lynn asked. I sighed.

"For the lifeboats," I replied. Lynn could see that I didn't want to talk anymore, and she fell silent, laying against me uncomfortably. I closed my eyes, trying to imagine myself on a sunny beach somewhere, lying on the sand with no clothes whatsoever on, just basking in the warm sunlight, as Harry stood behind me, speaking about love.

This fantasy didn't serve to warm me at all, but I kept at it, occupying myself with imagining all sorts of improper things that would have driven my father mad had he known of them. Somehow, the thought that the fantasy was a forbidden one only seemed to increase my creativity, and I elaborated them until they were so risqué, that even Rose might have blushed.

I don't know at what point I lost consciousness, but I remember the cold and the shock numbing me until I could feel nothing except Lynn's heart beating close to my own. Then, there was nothing.


	8. The End

The end of Mary's story. Whoo. Not sure if I should do a Lowe POV or not. I might. It could be interesting.

Chapter 8

Once again, I was awoken by Lynn shaking me furiously. I mumbled and lolled my head a bit, too cold and numb to do anything else.

"Over here!" Lynn screamed, her voice cutting through the darkness like a knife. A light shone at my eyelids, but still I did not open my eyes. I wanted to just lie there, undisturbed, though the cold was causing me great pain. I was so tired; I just wanted to sleep, but that blasted light...

"Please help me!" she screamed. "My sister's not waking up!"

I tried to wake myself up and tell Lynn that everything was going to be fine, but I couldn't. My body wouldn't respond, and I could only twitch a bit. I could only listen as someone yelled out orders, and the wood I was lying on began to rock almost violently. I heard Lynn being pulled into the boat, and in the next moment, warm hands wrapped themselves around me, and I was pulled into the boat.

"Take my flashlight!" yelled a familiar voice, and I was passed into a new set of arms. "Look for any survivors."

I was lain against something soft, and warm blankets found their way around me. Someone was rocking me back and forth, whispering something. A prayer, maybe.

"Is she alive?" asked Lynn's tearful voice. The person holding me choked back tears and kissed the top of my head.

"I'm so sorry," whispered someone up above me, so quietly that I could hardly hear. "So sorry."

I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelashes were frozen, and dripped water painfully into my eyes. I squinted up at the person who held me, and saw through the darkness that it was Harry, and that tears were glimmering in his eyes.

"Harry," I whispered lovingly, snuggling deeper into the warmth of the blankets and Harry's embrace. "Lynn?"

"I'm fine," Lynn piped up joyfully. "And Rose is here too."

I looked over and saw Rose lying against one of the passengers, unconscious.

"Is she all right?" I asked. Harry nodded, but didn't look too sure. "Jack?"

"I didn't see him," Harry replied, shaking his head. I nodded and snuggled deeper into Harry's embrace. "Don't fall asleep on me, Mary," Harry murmured into my hair, only pushing me deeper. "Please."

"Please, Mary," Lynn whispered. It was her pleading tone that urged me to open my eyes and smile weakly.

"You're a tough little girl, Lynn," I whispered softly. "You don't even look cold."

"I'm cold," Lynn whispered, reaching down and taking my hand. "Just not as cold as you. Thank you for saving me."

"I had to help you, I was your sister," I pointed out. "But I didn't save you."

I looked up and smiled at Harry. Lynn, sensing something, took off for the other side of the boat as if there were a whole mountain of blankets over there.

"Thank you," I whispered. Harry forced a smile, though tears were dropping on my face.

"You broke your promise," Harry said sadly. "Why didn't you get to a boat?"

"I went looking for my father, and then..."

I broke off as I suddenly became too weak and tired to speak anymore, and my eyes slid closed. I heard Harry begging for me to stay awake, but I could not resist the temptation of sleep, and I faded from consciousness.

Don't worry; I survived, obviously. I found out later that my father had shot himself rather than face the icy cold of the waters. I was angry with him, at first, for leaving Lynn and I so alone and helpless out in the middle of the ocean like that, but I eventually forgave him.

I found out that Jack had died as well. Rose wouldn't tell me anything more than that. I didn't ask. I just held her as she cried and let her hide from her parents and Cal in my sister's home.

As for Harry and I...well, how do _you _think it ended?


End file.
